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The Clitoris is the Only Human Body Part Solely for Pleasure

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The urethra is for peeing and squirting. The clitoris is just for fun.

Edited: November 29th, 2012

How to Give a Blowjob So He Cums in an Instant

A woman wants to please her well-endowed partner and needs some help. With a sore jaw, she wants to know how to give a blowjob he’ll enjoy much more (and much faster).

How can she improve her oral skills?

On a mobile device? Click here to listen.

Subscribe in iTunes!

And check out:
Nina Hartley’s Guide to Better Fellatio

Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide to Advanced Fellatio

And watch this sexy beast for jaw exercises to improve your oral stamina, whether you’re going down on a man, woman, or anyone else:

Do you have any how to give a blowjob tips to share?

Edited: November 28th, 2012

Sex Lessons From Oprah?

Most of us have some baggage… myself included! We carry around hurt from lovers past and present, times we’ve been rejected or judged – especially about sex.

Oprah has some great advice:

Forgive, so you can truly live.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean you condone the behavior or, in any way, make a wrong right. It just means you give yourself permission to release from your past — and step forward with the mud of resentment cleared from your wings. Fly!

When you let go of the past, you make room for more fun, love, and pleasure now and in the future.

Edited: November 27th, 2012

From Nun to Sex Therapist – Interview With Dr. Fran Fisher

Dr. Fran of ImproveIntimacy.com became a nun at age 18, left the convent and later became a sex therapist in her 40s.

Dr. Fran shares her fascinating story and her book In the Name of God, Why? Ex-Catholic Nuns Speak Out About Sexual Repression, Abuse & Ultimate Liberation. We discuss the impact of religion on sexuality and how she and other ex-nuns let go of their shame to learn to enjoy their bodies and newfound sex lives. If a former nun can scream “I love oral sex!” — whatever your sexual challenge, there’s hope for you yet.

Dr. Fran offers sex therapy to individuals and couples, both in person and via Skype.

On a mobile device? Click here to listen.

Subscribe in iTunes!

Edited: November 26th, 2012

What’s Your Orgasm History?

Carlin Ross, of DodsonAndRoss.com describes her “orgasm history:”

The earliest orgasm I remember was in the bathtub. When I was a girl, bath time was the only time I was left alone. My mom would run a bath and I’d jump in with my toys waiting until she left to slide out of the bathtub and ever so quietly lock the door behind her. Then I would turn on the faucet, sit down over the drain, and prop my little legs on either side. The water would run over my clitoris until I had my first orgasm. The first orgasm always took the longest. And the thought of my mother catching me made it all more exciting. She never did come back in time to ruin my masturbation party. She was easily distracted so I had a good 15 minutes to myself.

With each orgasm, I would turn down the water flow so by the time I was 3-4 orgasms in just a trickle of water would send me into orgasmic bliss. To this day, I love to have my clit teased with subtle licking and pressure. When I knew my time alone was about to end, I’d slip back out of the tub and unlock the door. One time my mom asked me about the marks on my bottom – I’d been sitting on the bathtub drain for quite a while and it had left little circles all over my cheeks. She never put two and two together.

One afternoon when I came home from school I found my brother up in a tree hanging gym ropes. You know those thick ropes they make you climb for those state fitness tests. We were all very excited to have school gym equipment in our backyard. I had no idea how much I was going to enjoy climbing those ropes…

Read on…

What’s your orgasm history?

Edited: November 24th, 2012

I Knew It Was Something Special…

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Edited: November 18th, 2012

My Husband Watches Gay Porn, Does That Make Him Gay?

Fantasizing about someone of the same sex or gender doesn’t make anyone gay. Really, nothing makes anyone gay – gay is a label we use to describe people who like people of the same sex. But many people experiment or have fantasies without wanting a serious relationship.

Similarly, Terry enjoys licking my feet during sex sometimes, but I wouldn’t say he has a foot fetish. (Though saying anyone HAS a fetish is, like calling someone gay, is just a label as well.) Its just something he enjoys sometimes. Its part of his fantasies. But its not the focus of his desires, nor is it necessary for his sexual happiness. Its simply one desire among many.

When I webcam or do phone sex, I often talk to “straight” men who want to be “forced” to have sex with other men. These men often want to be submissive, performing oral sex or receiving anal sex. Most just fantasize, some will do it, but its not a strong enough desire that they see themselves as gay or even bisexual. They want to be made to do it because they never would by themselves.

Sexual attraction is far more diverse than the categories we have to describe – gay, straight, bisexual, fetish, BDSM, vanilla. Most people have a variety of fantasies that don’t fit neatly into a single box.

What’s your opinion? Is he gay? What about you? Do you have fantasies that don’t match your “sexual orientation”?

Edited: November 16th, 2012

Penis Size Matters… Kind Of

In a new study on penis size, 1/3 of women who have vaginal orgasms preferred a larger than average penis, while 60% didn’t care.

Does penis size matter?

It does to some, but don’t reach for those “male enhancement” pills quite yet!

Subscribe in iTunes!

What do you think? Does size matter?

Edited: November 15th, 2012

Can Meditation Help Your Sex Life?

What does meditation have to do with fucking?

Do you ever find yourself “stuck” in your head during sex or masturbation? Worry about how you look, whether your body parts are “working,” if you’ll orgasm? Can’t stop thinking about what happened at work today, what you’ll do this weekend, or something your ex did 5 years ago? Feel so stressed out sex is the last thing you want to do?

Meditation and other mind-body practices (like yoga, tai chi, and chi gong among others) help bring you into the present moment – and that’s exactly where sex is happening.

Why be there in body but not in mind, heart or spirit?

Subscribe in iTunes!

Edited: November 13th, 2012

Female Orgasm Anxiety

A great question about female orgasm from a “new” lesbian, that applies to women of any sexual orientation.

A letter to Dr. Betty Dodson:

Hmmm where to start. Purge. After years of very bad sex with men – quick and fulfilling for one, I discovered my clitoris (with your help) and that I really like girls. I’m very proficient at sex for one, but that’s quick also. Now I have a lovely girl in my life I find the attention and pressure to orgasm too much.

She’s happy, she loves me, and we have lovely times together but I can’t orgasm. She says I need to learn to slow down. I try not to think too much and just enjoy but I can’t help thinking she’s getting bored. I’m ruining this beautiful thing because being the centre of attention freaks me out.

- V

Dear V,

Sounds like you’re suffering from a case of “pleasure anxiety.” Listen to what your GF said about “slowing down.” All heterosexual women struggle with the issue of taking too much time so you need to understand the problem. Straight sex is still based on the male model of sexual arousal. For the most part, men can get turned on quickly and climax easily (often too fast for us) so many women have been conditioned to “hurry up” during partner sex but that rarely results in a full satisfying orgasm.

I suggest the two of you share masturbation together. That way you can both observe the technique you each use for your orgasms. If she’s not “doing you” and you have control of your clitoris, once you have an orgasm in front of her the problem might simply go away. So stop being such a “drama queen” and understand that she enjoys being with and pleasuring you.

Dr. Betty

Masturbating together is great for couples of any sexual orientation – it can be sexy to watch your partner do themselves plus you’ll learn what they enjoy.

Edited: November 12th, 2012

I Touch Myself…

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Edited: November 11th, 2012

How to Be More Dominant if You’re on the Submissive Side

What happens when both partners are more submissive?

My boyfriend and I have great sexual chemistry and things have been going really well both inside and outside of the bedroom, but there’s one small issue: we’re both on the sexually submissive side. Though it is not usually an issue, it is clear that we’d both prefer being with someone more sexually dominant than ourselves. I would like to try and see if I have it in me to be more dominant in the bedroom because I know he would really like that, but I have no idea how! I would really appreciate some tips on how to take charge in the bedroom. Thanks.

Here’s what Em and Lo have to say:

You don’t have to be dressed in head-to-toe pleather, wielding a riding crop and saying things like “You’ve been a bad, bad boy” to embrace your inner dom. Here are five simple things you can do — with or without props — that don’t require a lot of emoting on your part:

(1) Tie him up. This is domination 101. By restraining him, you make him a slave to your sexual will. After you tie him up, you don’t even have to do anything that kinky, just hop on and enjoy yourself, even if that means nice, face-holding lurve-making…

(2) Blindfold him. This is another BDSM basic. By impairing his vision, you make him more vulnerable…

(3) Take his voice. You could gag him, but that can be a bit tricky (safety-wise) and uncomfortable. Just tell him he’s not allowed to say anything during your session, and if he does, you get to spank him (on only the fleshy part of his bum, not too hard)….By the way, it’s good to agree on a safeword beforehand that he can use in case he needs to tell you that something is uncomfortable or have you stop…

(4) Play “Dominant Says.” He’s only allowed to do what you tell him to do: from taking off his clothes to touching you, from going slower to going faster, etc…

(5) Make him your foreplay love slave. You don’t need to make him do your laundry or scrub your floors — that just seems rude. But why not make him do a little dirty work before getting it on: have him bathe you, shampoo you, towel you off, moisturize you, dress you in your best lingerie (or whatever), brush your hair… Hell, you could even make him give you a foot massage!

Even if domination doesn’t come naturally to you, exploring the ‘other side’ can be erotic. If you’re both submissive, take turns and make it a game to explore domination. It can be tons of fun to try something new – even if you feel silly. And being in charge of your partner’s pleasure can help you understand and connect with your partner on a deeper level.

Edited: November 4th, 2012