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An Embarrassing Story: Why You Should Only Use Toys Made For Your Butt, In Your Butt

People like to put all kinds of things in their orifices…

And sex educators always like to say its smartest & safest to use toys with a flared base in the butt so they don’t get lost. Kinda like this:

But I think we’ve all heard of situations that ended up more like this:

Fortunately those x-rays are not of MY butt. BUTT I did come close… listen to the hilariously embarrassing story for the details!

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Edited: April 17th, 2014

Penis Size Worries: Can I Have Sex With a Small Penis?

Like women are stereotypically concerned about being fat, men are worried about penis size.

Its okay. We’re all insecure about something, sometimes. So what are the options with a smaller penis?

Question via Tumblr:
I watched your video about penis size and I appreciate you making it, but I was just wondering what are the smaller guys to do. I understand that we can buy extenders and toys to use, but if I have to put a piece of silicone over my penis to have sex, am I really having sex? Am I doomed to have a non-penetrative sex life without the use of toys and contraptions? I’m sorry just the thought of it really scares me. (thanks for your time Kelsey)

That’s between you and your partner. You don’t have to do anything to ‘extend’ your penis size, nor may your partner even care. Guys put WAY too much emphasis on size. But if your partner doesn’t like it – get a new one. Just like if a guy didn’t like my small boobs – he’d be welcome to go find someone with big ones, if that’s what he really wanted. You can’t be everything to everyone. Just be you, as they say, everyone else is already taken anyway.

On your end, just realize that if it is small, she may enjoy the physical feeling of something larger – which has nothing to do with YOU, just a physical sensation. Just like you may enjoy how fucking her ass feels because its tighter, for example, but it doesn’t mean you don’t like her pussy, her mouth, or her personality. Its an enjoyable sensation. If she likes that feeling, just be willing to explore how she could have that sensation with you, whether it comes from your penis or not.

It doesn’t mean you’ll NEVER have intercourse, it just means to be open to exploring anything that feels good for BOTH of you. Which is something I’d say to anyone no matter how big or small their parts are. Intercourse can be great, but everyone has their own tastes.

For instance, using toys on her for ‘foreplay’ or to help her have an orgasm, then finishing up with intercourse. Or having oral for her and intercoruse for you. Or intercourse then using toys after. Or intercourse one day and something else the next. The possibilities are endless, and she may even have desires that have nothing to do with penis size (spanking, BDSM, roleplay, etc.). Just keep an open mind.

Edited: August 9th, 2013

Exploring My Body Through Masturbation

Before the holidays, I started reading For Yourself: The Fulfillment of Female Sexuality. The author suggested that women who have trouble with arousal, orgasm, or who simply want to improve their sex life masturbate for an hour a day (only 4% of your day). I talked about it a bit on this podcast on masturbation – and my decision to start giving myself the time & space to learn to really enjoy my body. To learn to orgasm easily in ways other than how I’ve masturbated since childhood. To learn to FEEL PLEASURE. To learn to orgasm with Terry.

So I’ve been doing this for 3 days. Tonight I discovered a new sensation I enjoy. Normally when I use a dildo, I just like feeling something inside me. I don’t normally move it in and out, except to get myself more lubricated. But today after I had my first orgasm, I lay there and ever so slightly moved my dildo in and out of my pussy. It wasn’t in very deep – the ‘head’ was JUST in, close to my g spot. It may have been imperceptible to someone watching, but I felt it. A tightening sensation on the top of my pussy, inside. Not exactly my g spot, but nearby.

I had a second orgasm, keeping my dildo stationary at the peak. Feeling like I had to squirt, I quickly grabbed a pad to catch my juices and propped myself up on my elbow. I moved the dildo in and out of my pussy, with a little more depth and speed this time. Within about a minute I started gushing while it was still inside me. And when I pulled it out, clear liquid shot out, near soaking the pad completely.

I tasted the liquid – a very very slight urine taste, as my ejaculate often does. But I’d peed before masturbating so I knew it wasn’t urine, perhaps just a few drops got mixed in.

I love discovering new sensations my body enjoys.

Edited: January 7th, 2013

Sex Problems: The ONE THING You MUST Know

We spend so much time, energy, and money on sex toys, therapists, and Viagra. But what’s REALLY causing your sex problems?

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Edited: August 19th, 2012